Musing is my prerogative and when else would I ever have an opportunity to discuss this. I’m within the window of bliss.
British humour exists deep within my bones. A Monty Python skit about a bunch of English sailors marooned at sea for 33 days and no food discuss in a very dry, British, logical way whom they should eat. Volunteers throw their names into the mix, they discuss, and someone says I’d rather eat Johnson. Within that skit, and with a select group of friends, I was given a nickname that has stayed with me since my early twenties (I’ll never tell).
About seven or eight years ago I was at a gathering with a bunch of people I did not know. It was mostly people in my yoga circle before we became friends. And I was being asked questions as they tried to figure out who I was. She asked me if I had any nicknames. Whoa that’s the most interesting and probing question I’ve ever been asked. I have lots of them I answered. What are they. And yada, yada, yada, I never told them that one.
At this moment as I sit in that proverbial lifeboat waiting to be saved all I can do is hope. I am tasty but not without disease. You could do a pretty good fry up with my parts and I’d keep them soldiers alive a few more days. Maybe just enough to be saved. But I’d rather not let them eat me as I know I’m going to be ok. I’d rather eat Johnson. He looks like he’s a goner and I want to be saved. So my vote is Johnson.
I still don’t have results and I’m starting to think about what would I do if my doctor says my cancer has spread. Do I have a threshold or limit I’m willing to go through just for a few more years of life. And to be honest I don’t know the answer to that question. I guess I’ll know when I get there.
I know I’m being a bit over dramatic and jumping the gun but it’s a conversation that I have not had with anyone even myself.
I truly believe I’m going to be OK. But my story TAB-ER-NAC that I posted a few weeks ago has me thinking why did I hear that beautiful conversation.
And while I think about us marooned sailers we are really just trying to make it to the next day for the possibility of being found and saved. So it’s totally logical for us to be having that discussion.
It’s dark humour at its best and I love it.
I’d rather eat Johnson.
Take care.