Yoga Journey #11

My Pleasurable Practice.

And I’m not talking about the above photo of what greeted me one morning before practice – my granddaughter was visiting.

I can remember one of the things my first Ashtanga teacher told me. In the total fog of initial learning he said that once learned; practice can be done at home or anywhere – you don’t need to come into the studio (paraphrased). And I can remember when he said that because it stuck with me and I thought about it that day when I got home. It’s not revolutionary what he said but for some reason it made an impression.

“Fitness” for me has always been more of a necessary evil. That sounds a little harsh but I have played and enjoyed team sports as I grew up and into my mid thirty’s. The binding of a group to a goal and the camaraderie is an awesome experience win or lose. My fitness was required for the team not for me. Kind of a weird way to look at things but that’s how I viewed it. And to be honest I was never really fit.

As I moved into my forties I tried to get fit with home exercise machines and or running. Both of which was not for me and therefore as I got older, got MS, I did nothing much to maintain any kind of fitness – until Ashtanga.

Because Ashtanga is a set series of asanas, with movement, breath, and dristi it’s formulaic in a way that became, over time, a personal journey each day. This is perfect for me as it flows from asana to asana, it’s repeated over and over and it eventually becomes muscle memory. It feels beautiful to flow in that way and become someone who is calm, relaxed, and purposeful.

I posted in a previous blog that my Mom watched my practice in her backyard for the whole hour and a half. That was a few years back and I was relatively new to the whole primary series but my mom said that it was beautiful. And she is correct it is beautiful – now.

At some point my practice became sensual to me after that backyard session:
I love the initial sensation of my feet and then hands touching my mat.
I love the very first breaths in Adho Mukha Svanasana (downward facing dog).
I love the space that breath provides.
I love the sound of other people’s breath.
I love the sensation of sweat slowly forming on my body.
I love the touch of someone else’s hands helping me succeed in an asana.
I love to be completely folded over in the final Paschimattanasana feeling my own breath, sweat, and body heat.

It’s an unconditional surrender and it’s all for me, for my benefit, it’s selfish in a way but necessary. And just using that one word selfish, betrays the underlying reason for my practice. And I want to say more here; but I’ll resist the temptation to wallow in the sea of more Love’s.

So in these times when other people’s breath, or someone’s touch, or the community is not there. I go back to the words that Jeff said about being able to practice anywhere and I can still find enough to feed my selfish aspirations (double entendre intended).

Practice is an enjoyable way to stay “fit”. It’s not something I have to do but something I want to do. I crave it I look forward to it I enjoy it. I will continue to do it as long as this body lets me – and maybe even the next one – ha.

Be safe.