COVID Practice
It’s been just over a year of practicing alone(1). First in my messy basement and then when it warmed up, I moved to my deck on the side of my house. A few times I ventured out to local parks and then as summer came to an end I moved back to my messy basement which I finally decided to fix up.
I’m so happy that I fixed it up and made it more welcoming and calming. I enjoy practicing there now where half the space is dedicated to my practice – lots of room. So I don’t feel confined and it’s an inviting place to be. Positive vibes are developing.
Even in a good place to practice motivation can be difficult without support and to me that means community and a teacher. It was coincidental that where I practiced before was closing down just before COVID unleashed its wrath upon the world. The closing of the shala was definitely a sad event but that determination was just prior to a soon to be forced COVID shutdown.
I loved to practice there where the vibe was peaceful and calming and my fellow yogis represented all the good vibes that are part of our teacher. That place was as comfortable as my favourite hoody.
Practicing there with a relatively small community where there was always an awareness of who was practicing. The vibe was peaceful, calm, and loving. Most of us were aware when milestones were approaching and about to be achieved. We would know and recognize the achievement even if it’s just a look, a nod, a smile. It was like we were invested in each other’s success – it made me feel good. And I’ve probably romanticized this a bit but that’s how it felt to me. I truly loved to start my day there. And if I could speak metaphysically, and that is a query…. I could feel and absorb what could not be seen. That may sound obscure but part of this journey is about just that kind of awareness. The vibe I felt was real and there is definitely stuff happening. You may not have noticed that I noticed, but I did – umm – Yoga is more than a physical journey.
And another place where I loved to practice was in Carlsbad, California and a wise teacher there said that the goal of yoga is to still the mind. These days I’m as far away from a still mind as I can possibly get. I can’t even see my mat anymore it’s covered in thoughts. It’s so bad that I’m actually improving on the physical aspects of practice because I’m spending the time to think about what I’m doing – ha. That does have benefits as my practice is getting noticeably better.
I think most of us arrive where we never expected to be at some point in our lives. I know that’s happened to me more than once. Eight years ago I started Ashtanga Yoga which introduced me to a world I knew nothing about. The sign above the door said: “Yoga Class – Inquire Within”(2). And that is exactly what I did.
Over this past year of COVID practice I’ve been up and down, on and off, stopped and started but I’m still at it and I’m very much looking forward to the day when I can return to the community. It’s been a tough year for all of us and this is just a yoga / MS blog. However the one thing I don’t think about when I practice is what is going on outside. I’m pretty much spending one and a half hours most days on my mat and the focus that that currently brings. The stillness will come back eventually but at least I’m focused on what is directly in front of me. In actuality it’s an empty fireplace – I wish it was an empty head – ha.
COVID practice became more introspective and in some sense more resilient. At least that is how it went for me. We had / have to figure out our own paths through. And it did not surprise me that I would continue my practice alone. It’s the beauty and the bane of practice; it can be maintained just about anywhere but I prefer to be with teach and the community and I’ll keep at it until that becomes possible again.
This blog is about my journey over the last eight years of yoga and 25 years of MS with the experience that life before lends. I continue to learn and over this last year much has happened, moved on, and continues to unfold. However the time on my mat stayed mostly consistent. I don’t know how to sit still and meditate as that form of stillness has yet to be achieved. However I have and will achieve stillness again as I move in practice. “You don’t meditate to make the mind still. You meditate when the mind is still”(3).
COVID times have changed everything and practicing alone is just one little inconvenience that I can deal with while I wait for that poke to rejoin the human race. I’m actually very fortunate to have a space to practice in but I’m counting the days to when I can rejoin, hug, smile, say hi, and so so much more……
Miss you.
Be safe
(1) I did practice once at a shala and once at the park with some friends.
(2) I think Tim Miller said that when I was at teacher training – it’s definitely not fresh out of my mind.
(3) Tim Miller